outrage

I have been following the increasing outrage and public protest  over the gang rape of the 23yr old student.While she copes bravely and according to televised reports is mentally stable and coping with her injuries,Delhi's young are out on the streets.

And that's good ! Majority of protestors are young people ! That is a good sign ! Why are there not similar public protests against the police,lawmakers, law enforcers and finally Government all over India ?

Are police and bureaucrats only there to make 'money' while they hold Government offices ? The aam admi like me and you are hassled everyday by this 'democratic' governance which quietly accepts bribes and tokens and gifts just to do their work.
And then that too they don't do properly!

Police force is dominated by men.They always have been since so many years. Couldn't they be sensitized towards crimes against women? How many more years will that take ? And meanwhile, do they expect women to keep quiet and not demand justice and suffer in silence ?

Police women [ the few there are] are useless and unkind to other women so clearly being a woman in law enforcement will not guarantee anything !

Rape is not just about sex. Men don't understand RAPE !For them its sex at ALL costs ! Women who bring up sons need to drill in their minds that touching a woman without her consent is NOT ACCEPTABLE. Parents who bring up sons need to drill this again and again and again till their sons get this message. It needs to start at the very young age.

Please talk about sex to your sons or go to a doctor who can answer all questions about it.Teach your daughters to not be coy or mistake possessiveness for love and not flirt for favours !
Lastly, stop ostracizing rape victims ! Its not her fault even if she wore short skirt, went out alone with the guy on a date,or just trusted a friend.Its not her fault if the husband didn't understand 'No', or that leech of an uncle took advantage of her young age of 3.

Ostracize the rapist not the victim ! If Police force of India CANNOT respect women and do their jobs then may be we don't need this kind of lethargic police force !

As a nation, India has failed ! Indian women are still going around in circles of Indian culture,values,responsibilities with a whole lot family honour dumped on her frail shoulders !

Indian men

Men don't care about rape .Indian men more so !No wonder when heinous rape cases make headlines...most men keep quiet and slink away. Women get angry and depressed and sometimes both!

Women get afraid ..Indian women are habituated and trained to live in fear. So much so when brave Indian women live on their own and are actively choosing their virtues and vice , indian men have a problem with it.They don't want indian women to breathe ,live and be happy without them. They just want them to cook,clean and breed for them without asking questions.

Indian men talk a lot about culture.... they make sure their wives and daughters remain within 'culture'then they go out of their homes and stare and stare at every passing woman.Some men think its alright to stare and make the indian woman uncomfortable!

Here i want to tell you my experience. I went on religious trip to Kerbala [Iraq] 2 years ago with my Mom and Dad. From the moment I stepped on battle weary and bombed Iraq,i experienced a freedom of different kind...the men there [Muslim majority country] didn't grope me,not one stared at me, didn't bore into my eyes while talking to me.I was a foreigner there wearing a colorful rida among their women in sea of black.

They were gruff and aloof and mostly avoided talking to us [ though Iraqi women did talk with us indian women in the mausoleums].But not one man made me feel conscious of being a woman the whole 12 days i was there.I felt free in a burkha clad Iraqi city.That is what i still have to feel in India !

Indian men are socially warped..because they want to cover up their women in the name of culture and then go out of their homes and tear off clothes of a woman and rape her because her jeans was too tight or skirt too short.
I think its not about clothes because even saree clad women and salwar kameez wearing women are raped in India.

Women and men in India are bringing up boys too lightly,too much undisciplined.Mothers don't know what their sons are upto.Parents here hide the son's faults, don't give stricter punishments. Something is fundamentally wrong with Indian society and the way its brings up its children especially men.

Men are not gods, a solution to all your problems,woman!Recognize what harm your son is capable of .Instead of insisting he becomes a MAN,just insist he becomes a human being...a decent one at that !

Stop sweeping everything under Indian values and culture.

Aiyya!

There are films and then there are Films !

I watched Aiyya on TV 15 days ago and now i have already seen it thrice.Its come on TV quite early since its release and that means the film has not probably done well in theatres as other 'B%%&*&* films have been doing.


When i saw the film , i instantly felt it may not have done well simply because it was woman centric, Not Khan oriented, and it was Not derogatory to women as Rowdy Rathore or such trash dished out in the name of mainstream 'entertainment'.

Before any one jumps at me..i tried to see Rowdy rathore when it came on TV.It was pure F&%&%* Bullshit. I just could not tolerate the innuendos and pure rustic derogatory portrayal of women both in lyrics and the dialogues.It induced an headache and i lost interest halfway through the movie.It was not funny and not worth a penny.

On the contrary, Aiyya was pure fun. Rani Mukherji was innocent, funky and sexy all at the same time ! I wanted to see the film for Rani since in the promos she sizzled and was sparkling in every weird dialogue of the film.I wished I had seen it in a theatre but i am so disillusioned by Bollywood films that wasting 200+ and make an effort to go to the theatre is too much work for me!

The whole concept of a middle class woman following her nose [ literally] dreaming,lusting after a guy of her choice was great.

Such a different and refreshing film ! The loud comic scenes were devoid of cheap thrills and for the first time i actually laughed at the slapstick comedy. Slapstick comedy by women ..wow ! Even the melodrama was endearing !
No boring repetitive reference to heroine's patli kamar and how it enthrals and makes the day of the hero. No bakwas on how a woman should be ! No bikini in one scene and then salwar kameez in another. No unnecessary and forced drinking and shooting drugs to sport coolness or heartbreak.

Rani's character Meenaxi even runs away on her engagement day to wait for the chance to speak to the guy of her dreams.She brings him home and frankly asks to get married to him.How cool,liberated and reeking of bravado is that!

The end of the film seemed hurried and there was something missing in certain scenes but overall the captivating performance by Rani stole the show.

Prithviraj played the supportive role and was an apt 'object of desire'.Prithiviraj was hot, period !

The day dreaming scenes where Rani drifts off to ultra glamorous avatar completely different than her day to day life was completely relatable by me.I used to notoriously and vicariously live in my crazy dreams and i was always more beautiful, more glamourous, and slimmer with a perfect figure in my day dreams !
How cool it is to portray this reality of most of us middle class ordinary girls and women !

The movie was fresh fun and i loved the background score when the credits rolled out at the end !

A different woman oriented film.Go watch it for Rani Mukherji..i like her better in Aiyya than Black !

Facial

Most of us do facial to relax and hopefully undo some surface level damage to the skin. Nowadays i have heard dermats doing some curative level peels and facial which mimic the effect of a facelift. Completely remove the old skin to reveal new skin.Well, i have no idea about them since i haven't got it done.

I want to share the basic facial I do at home.I am always amazed by how little amount of ingredients is required for a facial at home and most of them are there at home.There are so many delicious sounding kits available in the market by most brands. I haven't used any but i am sure they must be getting the job done if you don't expect the moon from them and don't believe their claims.

Here's what i do:

1. Cleansing:

I usually wash my face with a facewash before i start.Then depending on my mood i use either a ready made mild scrub like Ever yuth 's ultra mild scrub. I like this one its papain based [papaya enzyme] or Nivea Pore refining scrub face wash directly [ i don't know if its still available in india]. For extra exfoliation i either use plain table salt/instant coffee powder and gently rub it on the face. Sometimes when i am out of scrubs,i apply cleansing milk[ i use garnier/lakme] and then use salt/ coffee or cocoa powder and rub it all over my face and neck for 2-3 mins.

When you rub your face be gentle.You'll usually require only 1/4th tsp of salt/ coffee powder. Do it only for 2-3 mins.Keep applying water if skin feels dry.

2. Massaging:

I don't really massage my face because i don't know how to.So whatever little i know i use simple gentle strokes. I apply either olive/sesame/jojoba/apricot oils from the bottle in winters and coconut oil in summers.Sometimes i mix a little of oils with my moisturiser and apply. The point i am trying to make is i use whatever is on hand and what i feel like using at that time.I use refined oils and olive oil i use is usually the light yellow one [ so not extra virgin oil:I rather eat extra virgin olive oil than put it on my hair or face]

Massage and apply oil or cream till its soaked in.

Masks/Packs:

I have 2 standard recipes for face packs: For winter: In milk i put lemon juice, let it curdle then add honey,ambahalad and manjisth powders .Then depending on requirement,availability and mood, i add either powdered oats/masoor dal powder. Sometimes i add kokum butter/moisturiser to it.

In summers: I mix multani mitti with milk/ rose water add, sandal,manjisth and ambahalad to make face pack.

I keep the pack for 20 mins.

I usually have some herbs like licorice, neem always around so i use them too sometimes.I remember once i used my regular moisturiser as base and added neem powder and oats to make face pack.It works really well.

I wash off with water and dry with a towel. I usually don't find the need to moisturise afterward but if you do you can definitely apply a moisturiser or serum.

That's it. I admit its not fancy but i like how clean, smooth my skin becomes afterwards.In summers especially,the multani mitti pack dries up oil and shrinks pores,cleans the skin all at one go.

If you try it do let me know if it worked well for you as it has for me.

Sally Hansen Diamond Strength No Chip Nail Color

The first cosmetic i purchased when 12 was a light brown Lakme nailpolish. I didn't even know how to apply neither did Mom. You see, my mom never used nailpaints.

But i still remember how i used to apply in diwali vacations and how i got rapped on knuckles by nuns in school because i didn't remove nail polish when school restarted. I didn't know there was some thing called nail polish remover...my poor mom found one for me and scrubbed my nails clean. I promptly forgot about the nail polish until i found it in my drawer after some years ...dried and flaky.

I somehow never became a nailpaint fiend. My guess is its because it required time to apply well and then to dry and because i grew up in times when only 'actresses' or 'bold' girls wore bright nail polishes [read red and its shades!]. So i got stuck with a mental framework and subtle light peach,pink or mocha colors.

I wore light peach,lilac,light brown,nude,light pink through out college. Half the time i never had to remove nail polish- i worked with ethanol,acetone, hexanol,toluene in the lab through out college. On top of it, my nails chipped and broke easily. Here i want to tell you i have slim long fingers and nails so i was quite happy with their appearance even though I couldn't grow nails longer than 1/8th of a cm.

I am impatient with nails so though broke i used to use Maybelline express finish and Revlon. Only these 2 were available besides Lakme which talked about fast drying and long wear about 14 years ago. Its only now that there is Colorama. I have used Colorama [maybelline]. They are quite ok but some shades chip like plastic in about a day. I still use Maybelline Express Finish and Revlon. Revlon has hopeless colours now - nothing new. But these two are the only easily available ones which survive more than 2 days on my nails.

So my search lead me to try Sally Hansen.I asked my dad to bring Sally Hansen Diamond strength nail paint. It costs nearly Rs 500 in india and that too online. I haven't seen any in stores in Pune.

Since,dad would bring from US i asked for one. Its cost him $4 -$5.He got me one called 'Pink Promise'. For shade and other details go here.





The USP of this range is touted as: No chip.

And Chip it DID NOT !

The colour was warm light sparkly silver pink and to test it i put only 2 coats without topcoat.

It lasted a week on me. Can you imagine ? Here i would like to add that i do lot of house work and wash utensils with my hands without gloves. I am telling you this only because i was so surprised that it lasted a week....I would have been happy with only 4 days of perfect nails because most nail paints don't follow through their claims especially 'No-chip' claim

So can you imagine how long it would last on some one who doesn't do much with her hands.

Other things i noticed is : No smell/vapors of anything otherwise nailpaints smell of toulene or something ! The Maybelline Express Finish have acetonish/or aldehyde smell so does Revlon.

I plan to try one from Sally Hansen's regular range too.

Go get hold of it...if you have friends in US ask them to buy you some.Or buy from india.... I don't know just try for yourself.