Cancer hit my family pretty hard exactly 1 year 3 months and 15days ago. I never thought: of all diseases, cancer would hit home . My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer-out of the blue. The year went like a whirlwind -all that i have now is dust in my eyes and ears. For the first 2 months, all of us were dazed.
How can anyone be alert for cancer?
Cancer is part of my life -its always there at the back of my mind. We celebrated when mom got her mammography done last time.She'll have to undergo sonography and x-ray every three months- no guarantees !
We live in hope with unvoiced dread.I've become more cynical,realistic and cold in many ways- I don't know what anyone else can be.
My father suffers from glaucoma,operated in one eye. He has been putting eye drops from last 8 years.He'll have to continue putting drops everyday till he lives.He has diabetes and blood pressure.He's the guy who eats at home ,does not smoke or drink.My mom is a cancer survivor and life is not the same after chemotherapy .Her bones are weakening ,a probable side effect of aromatase inhibitor that she has to take for 5 years.My mom does not drink or smoke ,eats at home, has borne 3 daughters and breastfed them and still she got cancer.Since she's a courageous funky lady who functions on will power- she makes rotis for us and she does most of the things for herself at home.Yet, she's scared of going out alone and crossing the road because she might not be able to run,if required, while crossing the road as traffic in Pune is perilous if not downright crass.
I don't ask anything to God when i pray to him. Don't ask anything to Him for myself.I don't feel like it !And I haven't cried in last one year.Last time i cried was when the fluid sample taken from lump was confirmed cancerous. And that's funny because before my mom got cancer i used to cry when things didn't go my way,in pain or even for a sob story.
Tuesday, 23 June 2009
Monday, 1 June 2009
Money ,money- my money
I had a frustrating time over the phone with Bajaj Allianz customer care. hence this post. 3 years ago i was sold a ULIP- a bajaj allianz ULIP. And the stock market tanked !
When i bought the policy - it was bought from a friend. I was informed about the charges but nothing about returns and risk and surrender charges.
So now i'm stuck with paying 3 year premium -locked in and the agent who is unreachable through phone or in person -absconding.
Over the period of 3 years this is what i learnt and hopefully still learning:
1. Don't buy a ULIP or mutual funds just because a smooth talking agent promises returns.The returns are NOT gauranteed. In India, even gauranteed returns are NOT guaranteed. So life rule no.1 is applicable here as well,- There are no gaurantees ! .....Yep, don't even trust 'friends' !
2. Read up as much as you can on ULIPs [ it seems in India, 90% of the people are invested in ULIPs and insurance companies are flourishing because people know next to zero about ULIPs].
Its your hard earned money and not the agents'.
3. The agent/financial planner'advisor is going to abscond,disappear, turn a deaf ear etc because that's how business is largely done in India. So be prepared mentally, to keep tab of your investments.
4. Even if the agent doesn't abscond, you still need to periodically keep checking NAVs,make switches in funds in ULIP.You'll need to give more Time to it than your wife/husband/job, i guess.
5. ULIPs have poor returns especially after you include the hefty charges they take from your premium. Yes, buddy, you are probably stuck in a sinking ship just like me.
6.They have a hefty surrender charge even after 3 year lock in period.
7. Its a long long term investment.
8. The customer service of Bajaj allianz is appalling . So i figure, it'll be same with other insurance providers too. So,get very very persistent,assertive and rude if need be to get your work done. That's how it goes in India !
9. Stick to FDs especially if you are stock market,share market or bull /bear challenged !
When i bought the policy - it was bought from a friend. I was informed about the charges but nothing about returns and risk and surrender charges.
So now i'm stuck with paying 3 year premium -locked in and the agent who is unreachable through phone or in person -absconding.
Over the period of 3 years this is what i learnt and hopefully still learning:
1. Don't buy a ULIP or mutual funds just because a smooth talking agent promises returns.The returns are NOT gauranteed. In India, even gauranteed returns are NOT guaranteed. So life rule no.1 is applicable here as well,- There are no gaurantees ! .....Yep, don't even trust 'friends' !
2. Read up as much as you can on ULIPs [ it seems in India, 90% of the people are invested in ULIPs and insurance companies are flourishing because people know next to zero about ULIPs].
Its your hard earned money and not the agents'.
3. The agent/financial planner'advisor is going to abscond,disappear, turn a deaf ear etc because that's how business is largely done in India. So be prepared mentally, to keep tab of your investments.
4. Even if the agent doesn't abscond, you still need to periodically keep checking NAVs,make switches in funds in ULIP.You'll need to give more Time to it than your wife/husband/job, i guess.
5. ULIPs have poor returns especially after you include the hefty charges they take from your premium. Yes, buddy, you are probably stuck in a sinking ship just like me.
6.They have a hefty surrender charge even after 3 year lock in period.
7. Its a long long term investment.
8. The customer service of Bajaj allianz is appalling . So i figure, it'll be same with other insurance providers too. So,get very very persistent,assertive and rude if need be to get your work done. That's how it goes in India !
9. Stick to FDs especially if you are stock market,share market or bull /bear challenged !
hmm...
I finally saw Slumdog Millionaire ..thanks to cablewalla - both ,in English and Hindi.Yeah, i didn't go to watch the movie at the theatre !
And i was disappointed. I didn't like the movie so much.Maybe because i've been to mumbai and travelled in local trains, seen little children begging at traffic signals since i was a child or because i've seen too many slums and shanties perilously hiding behind a posh locality or even a not so posh one !
The first part of the movie was good.Especially the cinematography on the thumping music. I liked Rahman's music and am all too happy for the Oscars the movie got. However, the movie didn't blow my brains out nor did it devastate my heart like other realist,heart wrenching movies. I think Shwaas devastated me better than Slumdog millionaire. Since i'm a cry baby and an emotional sucker, there were few scenes in the movie which made me wail however overall it did not leave me cold. Therefore,I don't think the movie must have affected /impacted people who are generally cold,practical and cut throat in various degrees and yes -realistic !
After seeing the movie, i think Frieda Pinto was as much an aesthetic prop as any Bollywood heroine. She hardly had any scenes- not even enough to showcase her acting.It was out and out Dev Patel's movie and yes the children - the movie belonged to the children who acted so well.
And i was disappointed. I didn't like the movie so much.Maybe because i've been to mumbai and travelled in local trains, seen little children begging at traffic signals since i was a child or because i've seen too many slums and shanties perilously hiding behind a posh locality or even a not so posh one !
The first part of the movie was good.Especially the cinematography on the thumping music. I liked Rahman's music and am all too happy for the Oscars the movie got. However, the movie didn't blow my brains out nor did it devastate my heart like other realist,heart wrenching movies. I think Shwaas devastated me better than Slumdog millionaire. Since i'm a cry baby and an emotional sucker, there were few scenes in the movie which made me wail however overall it did not leave me cold. Therefore,I don't think the movie must have affected /impacted people who are generally cold,practical and cut throat in various degrees and yes -realistic !
After seeing the movie, i think Frieda Pinto was as much an aesthetic prop as any Bollywood heroine. She hardly had any scenes- not even enough to showcase her acting.It was out and out Dev Patel's movie and yes the children - the movie belonged to the children who acted so well.
Saturday, 16 May 2009
Compensation
The victim, Prashant S. Dhananka, 39,confined to the wheelchair due to negligence by a doctor at NIMS, Hyderabad got compensated for a lifetime on wheelchair.And guess what ,after 19 years !
Since India is touted and sold as 'medical tourism' spot, this case and registered cases of negligence by doctors if given enough limelight can hopefully bring about a change in attitude of doctors in India.
Sure, I completely understand that doctors in India want to recover their medical tuition fees, build a clinic- a superspecislity one in urban hotspot, send their children to US to study and all other dreams that middle class in India only dream about !
However, at the end of the day, their job is not similar to an software engineer.They are dealing with human lives !
Now , most doctors care least for human lives and same goes for hospitals . Remember we are a billion plus !
So. let's stop treating and respecting doctors as gods and quickly bring them under strict laws where if they neglect to do their duty in face of money or simply don't care enough they can be punished, sued and made to pay for their negligence in a year or two and not 19 years !
People who have gone under the knife or has seen a relative or friend getting operated very well know that hospitals and doctors explain the risk factors in 3-5 page document in which its clearly said that if anything happens to the patient on operation table its NOT their responsibility. And one HAS to sign this consent form BEFORE the operation.
In such a scenario, Indian public ,especially the uneducated ones have nowhere to turn in case of negligence by the surgeon. God knows, there must be zillions of cases languishing ,given up hope of any kind of redressal.
In US/Europe, medical fraternity is shit scared of being sued...when are our doctors going to be scared by laws and by awareness that their reputation could be ruined by being negligent. My personal opinion is, Indian doctors are overworked....they perform too many operations on monthly basis especially the really good ones. And in India- a clear 50% of the doctors have become doctors attracted by money,intelligence and because they scored 97-100% in PCB or cleared a bloody entrance exam with flying colours.
I think that's the reason young doctors especially the savvier ones protested so much when they were asked to dedicate a year of their life to rural and backward India - no money there but lots of mosquitoes !
Many more people need to become doctors because they really want to become one.
If they want to earn money, they could become software engineers !!
Since India is touted and sold as 'medical tourism' spot, this case and registered cases of negligence by doctors if given enough limelight can hopefully bring about a change in attitude of doctors in India.
Sure, I completely understand that doctors in India want to recover their medical tuition fees, build a clinic- a superspecislity one in urban hotspot, send their children to US to study and all other dreams that middle class in India only dream about !
However, at the end of the day, their job is not similar to an software engineer.They are dealing with human lives !
Now , most doctors care least for human lives and same goes for hospitals . Remember we are a billion plus !
So. let's stop treating and respecting doctors as gods and quickly bring them under strict laws where if they neglect to do their duty in face of money or simply don't care enough they can be punished, sued and made to pay for their negligence in a year or two and not 19 years !
People who have gone under the knife or has seen a relative or friend getting operated very well know that hospitals and doctors explain the risk factors in 3-5 page document in which its clearly said that if anything happens to the patient on operation table its NOT their responsibility. And one HAS to sign this consent form BEFORE the operation.
In such a scenario, Indian public ,especially the uneducated ones have nowhere to turn in case of negligence by the surgeon. God knows, there must be zillions of cases languishing ,given up hope of any kind of redressal.
In US/Europe, medical fraternity is shit scared of being sued...when are our doctors going to be scared by laws and by awareness that their reputation could be ruined by being negligent. My personal opinion is, Indian doctors are overworked....they perform too many operations on monthly basis especially the really good ones. And in India- a clear 50% of the doctors have become doctors attracted by money,intelligence and because they scored 97-100% in PCB or cleared a bloody entrance exam with flying colours.
I think that's the reason young doctors especially the savvier ones protested so much when they were asked to dedicate a year of their life to rural and backward India - no money there but lots of mosquitoes !
Many more people need to become doctors because they really want to become one.
If they want to earn money, they could become software engineers !!
Monday, 4 May 2009
Life lesson
Yesterday being a Sunday, i was doing timepass in my building lobby/entrance/whatever with children and teenagers who stay in my building. Out of the blue, a 10th standard teenager confided how confused she was and had no idea what to do for her career .Now, I was really scared ! I was fervently hoping that she wouldn't ask for any career advice. From last 5 years , i'm hopelessly clueless about careers.Personally, i am a career vagrant- I have managed to earn a living however have no career path whatsoever and i'm still clueless about what i really want to do or be.Since thinking about my lack of career and ambitions gives me headaches, i do whatever i get to do.
Hope against hope, she asked me :"Didi, should i do science? Then go for engineering /medicine... i can always change after 12th na, if i don't get a good score ?
If this question was asked to me 6-7 years, I would have promptly given her a short lecture on 'if you do this, than these are the options....blah,blah and blah'.Nowadays, teenagers are much sauve,smarter and aware about what options they have. They are very clear about values which will help them decide careers.It is science/engnrr/MBA/CA = potentially higher paying professional degrees. Everything else becomes an option, if you don't succeed in above mentioned choices.So, when this kid asked me for 'advice' , I gauged she was really looking for affirmation.
Instead of directly answering her question/completely evading her question I decided to tell her about a person's career path- someone I knew personally and have highest regard for.
I told her about X...who was very hardworking and extremely dedicated toward his studies. Maybe didn't score high enough to enter M.B.B.S in 12th however completed B.Pharm as topper in his college, i think. He worked hard at his job as an executive in pharma co. and with sheer determination,smart work and by knowing how to manage his superiors and bosses he scaled promotions. X also went on to work in clinical research and soon gave his CAT.[ I personally think, returning to books after working professionally full time for 3-4 years requires immense aptitude and motivation] . He cleared CAT while working fulltime and staying alone in a city away from his parents and immediate family.
Not only that, he took up an Executive MBA program for 2 years from IIM-K, [i think distance learning] and completed it successfully while working fulltime.
The last i heard from him he was a Project Manager- clinical research [inspite, of placements in management] - most importantly doing something he liked.
He spent his energy,time, and of course money for himself and the great thing is -he has something to show for them.
Kudos to Mr X !
I have repeated this achievement to many people around my age who are frustrated by lack of options, their jobs or general rut of life but this is the first time i told a 15 year old. I hope she doesn't snort and bicker because i didn't tell her what she really wanted to hear and actually remember this example.
Hope against hope, she asked me :"Didi, should i do science? Then go for engineering /medicine... i can always change after 12th na, if i don't get a good score ?
If this question was asked to me 6-7 years, I would have promptly given her a short lecture on 'if you do this, than these are the options....blah,blah and blah'.Nowadays, teenagers are much sauve,smarter and aware about what options they have. They are very clear about values which will help them decide careers.It is science/engnrr/MBA/CA = potentially higher paying professional degrees. Everything else becomes an option, if you don't succeed in above mentioned choices.So, when this kid asked me for 'advice' , I gauged she was really looking for affirmation.
Instead of directly answering her question/completely evading her question I decided to tell her about a person's career path- someone I knew personally and have highest regard for.
I told her about X...who was very hardworking and extremely dedicated toward his studies. Maybe didn't score high enough to enter M.B.B.S in 12th however completed B.Pharm as topper in his college, i think. He worked hard at his job as an executive in pharma co. and with sheer determination,smart work and by knowing how to manage his superiors and bosses he scaled promotions. X also went on to work in clinical research and soon gave his CAT.[ I personally think, returning to books after working professionally full time for 3-4 years requires immense aptitude and motivation] . He cleared CAT while working fulltime and staying alone in a city away from his parents and immediate family.
Not only that, he took up an Executive MBA program for 2 years from IIM-K, [i think distance learning] and completed it successfully while working fulltime.
The last i heard from him he was a Project Manager- clinical research [inspite, of placements in management] - most importantly doing something he liked.
He spent his energy,time, and of course money for himself and the great thing is -he has something to show for them.
Kudos to Mr X !
I have repeated this achievement to many people around my age who are frustrated by lack of options, their jobs or general rut of life but this is the first time i told a 15 year old. I hope she doesn't snort and bicker because i didn't tell her what she really wanted to hear and actually remember this example.
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